Authorities are asking for the community’s assistance in identifying and aiding in the apprehension of this individual. So this ‘Be On the Look Out’ warning will help. “Information has come to our attention that he may have been involved in some criminal activities earlier this month” stated chief of operations. When questioned by the reporters […]
Bank Robbery Gone Wrong
There I was, at the window, making a deposit to my account at the Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd credit union, when two masked men came in to rob the bank. It was so frightful! One of the desperadoes stood right behind me! His gun pointed at employees. He shouted “This is a robbery! Everyone do […]
Trying Out Spoonerism
The night ended with a soft thud as Chainsaw whacked himself in the head with his elbow. Mrs. Chicken, fighting back laughter, snuggled closer. “Maybe Thursdays are just for back rubs, Chainsaw,” she whispered. Over breakfast the next day, Chainsaw regaled their neighbor with his tale of their Tantric spooning innovation. The neighbor, doubled over […]
Cryptophasia
My twin brother Buzzsaw and I are some of the best known identical twins continuing to use Cryptophasia. What is that? Cryptophasia is that “secret language” that twins can develop to speak to each other from when they begin to speak. It’s words no one else can understand. But how does it happen? While some […]
Cannibals Ate My Uncle, too
The world was horrified when President Biden announced that his uncle Bosie was eaten by cannibals! The question swirls around… “Was he a soccer player crashed in the Andres?”. “Did he meet with Hannibal Lector?”. Was he part of crew with journalist Henry Stanley locating the missing missionary David Livingstone in deepest, darkest Africa back […]
Your Secret Email Needs
Are you in the need for a secret email account? Something that is just for you, keeping those pesky wives, girlfriends and government agencies out of your hair? We invite you to check out the email services offered by Robert L. Peters, Robin Ware and JRB Ware. These are the alias names our fearless leader […]
Google Gemini Fowled Up
Google said it plans to relaunch its artificial intelligence image generation software within the next few weeks after taking it offline in response to an uproar over what critics called “absurdly woke” depictions of historical scenes. Though the Gemini chatbot remains up and running, Google paused its image AI feature last week after it generated […]
Chainsaw Returns to Davos
Chainsaw Returns to Davos to market his offerings of Carbon indulgences. When asked how he eplains these indulgences, Chainsaw replied ” When I pay for my fuel for my plane, the act of paying for the aviation diesel is my purchasing offsets, so I can use my plane as I like. I have offset the […]
Chainsaw Acts in “Blackwing”
As Broadway struggles to return to it’s height since COVID, the latest hit is “Blackwing”. It’s the story of an outsider seeking acceptance in an obviously different community. Who would be a better player for this roll than Chainsaw Chicken. He constantly battles with oppression, injustice and preconceive ideas.
Dark Clouds Looming
The dark clouds are looming as to the chances of Chainsaw being able to participate in the Presidential debates. The rules of the debate state that the candidate must have ranking in the polls AND raise Three Million dollars in contributions. The popularity is not a problem but the money seems excessive. To deal with […]
Fake Chicken or Fake Beef?
With the new technologies to hit the consumer market, it’s not as tough as the scientists and officials claim to see the difference between real or fake meat. “Don’t believe your lying eyes!” some have said. “You won’t tell the difference.” Please focus on the picture. Tell me you don’t see that is not me, […]
Google Still Blocking
Chainsaw Spotted
Chainsaw Chicken was spotted outside the home of Taylor Swift apparently wearing a scarf from Miss Swift’s collection. Reportedly there for a private screening for friends of her new upcoming movie “THE ERAS TOUR“. It was also reported that Travis Kelce and Chainsaw got into a heated dispute about Kelce blocking the bean dip. Most […]
Booked with Atlanta 20
Everyone has seen the booking photo of Donald Trump. Many have seen Rudolph Giuliani’s picture has well. But that’s just two of the twenty that were also charged. Seem Chainsaw was one of the last that were caught up in the sweep. But what was Chainsaw accursed of perpetrating? Not any of the election interference. […]
Secret Service closes probe
The Secret Service is giving up on the mysterious White House cocaine (TNS) – The U.S. Secret Service has closed its probe into cocaine discovered at the White House without identifying a suspect. The agency said Thursday that it had conducted a “methodical review,” including identifying several hundred people who may have accessed the area […]
KFC Payback with Wasabi
I guess this American KFC Tweet relayed through a Japanese Tweet is some sort of a compliment idolizing myself. A clumsy attempt to piggy-back on my popularity. But… Remember that age old maxim… “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.” ― Oscar Wilde Remember Oscar Wilde? He was found […]
Tribute Prequel
Toonpool.com has a cartoon, apparently an attempt to be a prequel of the creation of Chainsaw Chicken. How did they know of Chainsaw Chicken when this cartoon was created? Possible a Ouija board, a drunken stupor or some psychic vision. Regardless, their illustration simultaneously predicted a dawning of this social influencer. Little did they know […]
Egg Donation Clinic
With the caring and compassion of any thoughtful person, Chainsaw has made an appointment at the local Egg Donation and Implantation offices. The office waiting room was mostly filled with wanting recipients of donated eggs. His goal is to share his eggs with those less fortunate. Sure, he is rewarded for this venture but that’s […]
Serial Killer Still Killing
When you think of the most notorious slaughter crimes in the U.S, you think of the Black Dalia Murder, Leopold and Lobe, The Zodiac Killer, Jeffery Dahmer or Ed Gein. But now there’s a new killer on the list. The Chicken Plucker Murderer! Another victim was found with the same usual M O . Just […]
Merger Signed
In the bustling city of Megapolis, two vastly different companies were about to embark on an unexpected journey that would forever change the landscape of their industries. On one side was Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd., a renowned global sarcasm website known for its finger-in-the-eye humor, and on the other was Toylandia, a whimsical toy company […]