“The Special One” Episode Synopsis: The parents of a child science prodigy are approached by a mysterious official called Mr. Pollo Chick, who offers to give him special private tutoring. Unknown to them, Mr. Pollo Chick is an alien who wants to use their son’s talents for evil. Seems only natural that this evil incarnation […]
Cranial-Rectal Inversion
Emergency services were called today to give assistance to one of my cousins, Hardwick Chicken. There was an unfortunate accident. It seems that Hardwick, while stepping out of the shower and drying off was approached by his dog. Feeling in an unusually frisky mood, decided to chase after the dog, playfully pulling on his tail, […]
INGSOC is Really CHICKENS
Many have seen the portrait of INGSOC on the banners and flags in the near-future docu-drama entitled ‘1984’, written by George Orwell, who’s real name was Eric Blair. Some have asked what INGSOC means? Well, Nancy… if you google the term, you learn that on wikipedofile says it supposedly means “a syllabic abbreviation for English […]
Welcome to Mars!
All the hoopla, the spectacle, the achievement… I have been on Mars for months! I’m one of the forward observers from my enlistment in Space Force. I am the negotiator for the America First Program to the ‘little green men’. They are little but they are not always ‘green’ and I have no indications that […]
Transhumanism for me!
Transhumanism is devoted to promoting the research and development of robust human-enhancement technologies. Such technologies, by merging with Artificial Intelligence sometimes call A.I., would increase human sensory reception, emotive ability, or cognitive capacity as well as radically improve human health and extend human life spans. That’s for me! With the average life span of a […]
Go Ahead- Make My Day
I will never forget when I got to play one of the kids on the school bus during the climax situation in the movie ‘Dirty Harry‘. I was so excited! I was always around the set several days before shooting my scene. I was even able to grab Harry Guardino’s copy of the script when […]
Bizarro World
This is so confusing. Is the goose swimming upside down or am I on my beak with my legs flailing in the wind? There is so much to consider. Let’s start with some facts. Geese are not the rocket surgeons we’ve been led to believe. Going north, heading south, flying in geometric patterns while in […]
LIVE – Zoom Chat
Welcome to our LIVE Zoom call… Please align yourself directly in front of our new web page embedded camera seen here. Please wait while the screen of your computer receives the firmware update making your display into a camera lens. Connection is being establish now. Introduce yourself to the room once your image is visible. […]
LuftChicken Airlines
Announcing the airline of the future. It’s named “LuftChicken”. But you may be asking yourself, “Why would anyone want to start up an airline right now with the restrictions and low traffic volume?”… Good question. Let’s ask the founder of this airline. It seems that he is piloting his maiden flight. We will try to […]
Biden’s SCOTUS Judge
Suddenly, with little clamor in the press, rumor has it that an additional name has been added on Biden’s SCOTUS short list. While the world is focused on the Super Bowl, The Genocide Olympics, Russian’s on the border of Ukraine, Covid 19 winding down and the new cat adopted into the White House, this new […]
Chinese New Year is here!
The White House, Senators, Members of Congress, Executives of Big Business, BIG Tech and New World Order are unified in the celebration of the Chinese New Year. This ’emerging’ country celebrates it each year. Chinese New Year also called Spring Festival or the Lunar New Year, is the festival that celebrates the beginning of a […]
New Green Energy Update
Chainsaw Chicken International-LTD, has done it again! Chainsaw Chicken, the CEO and President announced that they have successfully created an untapped energy stream. “It came to me when I was remembering something I’d heard so many people say… He’d be spinning in his grave if he knew what was happening”. Chainsaw has created a mechanical […]
The 4th Wise Monkey
Class! Eye’s here. please! You will be quizzed on this, so pay attention. Many of you have heard of the ancient Japanese iconography of 3 monkeys demonstrating the examples of what good people should be practicing… ‘Hear no evil’, ‘See no evil’ and ‘Speak no evil’. As this Freudian photo exemplifies, we see 3 Monkey’s, […]
Looking for Love
As it turns out, Cupid was the ancient Roman god of love and counterpart to the Greek god Eros. According to mythology, Cupid was one of the sons of Mercury, the winged messenger of the gods, and Venus, the goddess of love. He was often portrayed as a baby with wings carrying a bow and […]
Super Bowl Initiation
When I saw the half-time at the 2021 Super Bowl, I got chills. My body began to shake and shutter. I was instantly taken back to my P.E. class in the 7th grade. Oh… I feel nauseous! I remember it like it was the day before yesterday! My P.E. class was a mix of 7th, […]
In Mourning
Again, no one seems to care. Where are the Hollywood celebrities? The Telethons? The donation web sites? The Justice Department, even PETA or the ASPCA? I’ve given up on the Southern Poverty Law School, for obvious reasons. Millions upon millions of my fellow chickens have sacrificed their wings for this commercialize cultural event. As we […]
Replacing Newsom
After his announcement of offering to replace the soon to be recalled Gavin Newsom, Governor of California, Chainsaw Chicken faced the press who wanted to ask him about the reasons he is running. “Why are you running?” asked a reporter from the Times. Chainsaw answered ““I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not going to […]
Walk and Chew Gum
It seems what we constantly hear is that people can “Walk and chew gum at the same time” appears to not be a universal truth. Here at Chainsaw Chicken International – LTD, the hallway security camera caught one of our senior executives demonstrating the difficulty of the experience. Our corporation has made several requests for […]
Search and Destroy
Chainsaw Chicken has accepted the task no one seems willing to do anything about. He has decided to take on those damn SPAM CALLERS with orders to ‘search and destroy’. Using the method practiced in the Vietnam war when we were actually trying to win, he is planning on daily interdiction raids as well as […]
We Need Unity
Just as our fearless leader the President stated, the battle between chickens and turkeys have been extreme. But in one of the most beautiful gestures seen by modern man, Chainsaw Chicken, representing all chickens, has stated that “We must unite”. He said this and released a soft white dove gripping an olive branch, with an […]