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Available for Kindle
A flash from the past. Yes, my first book offered back in 2016 is available on Kindle. Take a look on Amazon and you will see this 109 page download of thoughts and stories with photos, just like you see on the web site.
New Emoji
Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd had their emoji submitted and then rejected. This was the third time. Now it took a legal suit to get Apple, Inc to finally agree to accept this submission. What changed their minds? It was simple. Chainsaw obtained a copy of the submission request put forth by the socialist agency that […]
Here’s Mud in Your Eye!
The Girls Showers
With a noticeable tremble in his hands and his voice, Chainsaw swallowed hard and dabbed the sweat beads on his brow. “This….. is…. the…the… girls showers!” He paused, moving around, shifting his weight from one foot to another…. “This was sacred ground when I was in school. It was literally ‘no mans land’ to us […]
Wuhan Lab Discovery
Guest scientist Fauci Chicken has been working non-stop for months at the Wuhan Labs, in order to try to avoid the similarities of the issues with Merek’s Disease and Covid-19. Here is what Wikipediphile says about Merek’s Disease in chickens: (look for yourself under ‘Prevention’ at the link below) “Because vaccination does not prevent infection […]
Machu Picchu Lawn Service
Isn’t Machu Picchu beautiful? The stone and grass make such a pleasing image. But you might be asking, “Grass? At 8,000 feet above sea-level? How curious. That must take a real professional yard service to keep it all looking so neat and trimmed with such color”. Let me introduce to you how these patches of […]
First Electric Cargo Ship
News arrived that great Uncle Henry Morgan Chicken has been selected to skipper the first, all electric cargo ship. When asked about this privilege, Captain Henry simply said “Arrrrrr, Supposed to be a great honorrrrr!” his Nantucket accent in full display. The interview continued, “So how long have you been a ships captain? Henry answered […]
Mech-Chicken 2021
Chainsaw Chicken was happy to take possession of a new prototype Artificial Intelligence equipped robot from MIT. The A.I. department has dubbed it “Mech-Chicken”. Mrs. Chicken, was visibly pleased saying, “Oh my word:. Do I have plans for you!” Transhumanism for me!
“Eat it, Jeff” launch ready
Doesn’t everyone have their own rocket ship, like Richard Branson, Jeff Bazos and myself? If you find that you don’t have your own rocket and you have a overwhelming desire to go to space, you don’t have to pay half a million for a seat. Not near that amount. Only $999.95 or $19 dollars a […]
Crime Out of Control
Crime is out of control. Look at the latest tragedy. One of my dear sweet cousins joined the ranks of the cult-like, ritualistic slaughter of chicken for this summer. My cousin was so consumed by the heat of the flames that all distinguishing traits were destroyed. We can’t even tell the sex. “This will probably […]
Evolution Disturbed
Scientist and evolutionist were elated when they heard that a huge block of ice was discovered that encased a prehistoric cave man. It was found at the foot of the glacier out-cropping near Yellowstone Park. Just as suddenly they were mystified and dismayed when they learned that the totally preserved, fully encased body was apparently […]
Bigfoot Drumsticks
There was little press coverage when a coalition of photographic professionals from NASA as well as experts from Chainsaw Chicken International, LTD announced the results of a digital computerized study of the famous Roger Patterson image of Bigfoot taken on 1967 in Northern California. Recently, claims have been made that the encounter filmed was a […]
Gain of Function
With all the talk of ‘Gain of Function” discussion going on, the world has learned a few new and startling facts. While visiting the other food market in Wuhan, China, called the ‘Moist Store’, similar to the infamous ‘Wet Market’, Chainsaw Chicken was approached by representatives of The Wuhan Institute of Virology to participate in […]
CDC “Don’t Kiss Chickens”
The CDC warned that poultry owners should take special precautions when handling their animals after 163 confirmed cases of salmonella were reported in 43 states. “Don’t kiss or snuggle backyard poultry, and don’t eat or drink around them.” That does it! Do I tell Dr. Rochelle Walensky who she gets to make out with? Does […]
And then, Cisgender
And then I got another message from my doctor. This time it was something called cisgender. Oh no. Not CISGENDER! Anything but THAT! But what is it? I quickly ordered the latest edition on woke-ism from Amazon, and with my Prime account I got it within 2 weeks. I immediately opened up to the “S” […]
Intersectionality Test
Woke affliction number 2; Then, the same doctor that said I had acquired impostor syndrome, sent me another message on his private medical site with results of some of my other tests. He said, “Intersectionality is an analytical framework for understanding how aspects of a person’s social and political identities combine to create different modes […]
I Got Impostor Syndrome
My first woke aliment: The diagnosis is in. I have a case of the most diagnosed social behavioral condition identified in the last year. The dreaded Impostor syndrome. My doctor sent me a message on his private client website saying the following: “Impostor syndrome is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, […]
Chaingun Chicken
The U.S. Navy and Chainsaw Chicken have reached a licensing agreement to use Chainsaw’s likeness in their new emblem and logo called ‘Chaingun Chicken’ for the Navy’s new fast attack boats that also qualify for the Green New Deal specifications. The Navy came to Chainsaw because of his popular image involves strength and ability as […]
Covid Entertainer
***PRESS RELEASE*** In an effort to try to get back to ‘Normal’ rather than living with a ‘New Normal‘ as well as to try to make people more comfortable with the aspect of Covid in everyday life, Mrs. Chicken has decided to relaunch her entertainment career. She is now doing song and dance numbers to […]