With tears in her eyes, Krissy Bobkins hangs another poster about her missing pet, Huey, her pet chicken. “He’s been gone for days now” she muttered through a tissue drying her eyes. “I swear, I miss him so much, it’s seems like I hear him sometimes, saying desperate words like “Help”, “I can’t breathe” and […]
Who’s in the Go-Go boots?
I was helping Grand dad Chicken clean out his room and pack things up as we decided to take him to the ‘home’ for more care than we can give him. “Have you got all your desk draws empty?” I asked Grand dad. “I think so”, he said. I pulled the draw out and there […]
We play Gov and Assistant
Mrs. Chicken and I need to thank you, Governor Cuomo. You have brought something special into our marriage without you even knowing us. Last week I was sitting on the couch with Mrs. Chicken when she put her arm around my shoulders. I told her “that was no way to treat the Governor of this […]
Sacrifice event
I found this photo in the back room at the community hall where I sometimes visit. There it was. It was all framed and hanging on the wall but obscured behind a bookshelf.. I took it down and went to the Grand Poobah to find out what it was from. “Your Majesty, Chainsaw requests a […]
Happy 4th of July!
Happy 4th of July! God Bless America from the Chainsaw Chicken family! In just about any other country, I would be drawn and quartered and given to KFC but here, I can say the truth about things and tell it like it really happens. Even if the head man wears aviator glasses or has an […]
Stool Pigeon
They are after me! They are using any method they can to get me. Just like the Attorney General of New York has been quoted to say, “Show me the man, I’ll show you the crime!” This “Stool Pigeon” just kept spewing all kinds of indictments about me! I’ve heard he said things like; “He’s […]
Keep Calm Statue
This statue was brought to Britain 119 years ago. It was removed from display at Cambridge University in 2006 over a ‘racism’ claim. The bronze cockerel, was known as the Okukor. IN 2006, the College’s student union passed a motion. They insisted it should be returned to present day Nigeria after they claimed British troops […]
Happy Mom’s Day!
Today we celebrate Mom’s everywhere. We collectively all celebrate the concept of ‘mothers’ and how we appreciate all their care, attention and loving in our lives. My mother is no exception. Sure, there are some mothers that may have been more care-givers, maybe more understanding, but none that were more affected by the results of […]
Spare the Rod…
Spare the Rod…Spoil the child! That’s what Chainsaw’s step-father used to say at every opportunity he had to discipline me. Sure, there may have been things that Chainsaw did as a adolescent with a inquisitive nature. Generally behaviors like “Will this carpet burn if I use an iron on high and let it rest for […]
Have Gun Will Cluck
It’s new series season again. Chainsaw Chicken has developed a concept package that he has been offering which flashes back to when Westerns were so popular on the small screen. Chainsaw takes literary license by borrowing from several previously successful shows, tosses them into a visual blender, spins on 12 for a minute and then […]
Chainsaw Chicken Peeps
Have you got ahold of the new Peeps for this year? It’s the Chainsaw Chicken Peeps. My box arrived today. Oh they look so good. This year, instead of fluffy marshmallow, Peeps decided to keep this version different by not allowing them to rise. They are also mixed with a layer of Sorghum to make […]
Cadbury Egg Winner
The winner of the Cadbury Egg Bunny Contest has been announced. It is questionable at best. It seems that Cadbury took a shine to this Polaroid photo submitted of my evil twin, Calloway Chicken, seen here in a dirty alley. He is nasty, grungy looking, as usual, only this time photographed wearing bunny ears. Calloway […]
Chicken-dactyl Called Foo
Tragedy struck the cold case team attempting to reconstruct the 1961 disappearance of Michael Rockefeller. He was the fifth child of Nelson Rockefeller and one of the heirs to the Rockefeller dynasty. All this mystery centered around Papua, New Guinea. Michael was ostensibly going to study the Asmat tribe, because they were some of the […]
Instruction Book
Has this ever happened to you? You are in a casual meeting with other friends or co-works, and they begin to use slang words and expressions you simply do not understand. What do you do? Do you just nod in acceptance to what they are expressing? Do you feel that you want to add to […]
Black light treatment
Several years ago it was thought that exposing the young to black light rays would ease their transition with the painful development of their pin feathers. Years later, it became more obvious that all the black light did was allow them to develop fuller, thicker, more glorious feathers but did not aid in the pin […]
Seminary Class 2021
This years graduating class from the exclusive Order of the Dark Priests filed out to be seen for the first time in their exquisite robes. Each of these emerging priests have been trained in the book of Enoch and other dark arts. Rasputin Chicken was the Salutatorian of the class while Giuseppe Alister was the […]
Chick-Kids Gathering
So much can be seen in this family reunion photo with all the Chicken kids gathered for a remembrance pic. All the relatives and their offspring. Left to right is Calhoun Chicken on the pony; his sister Dane; the Cacciatore twins – Sophia and Gina; Crocky (hiding behind the kids); Cheech (in the striped shirt); […]
Cowabunga Dude!
“Oh righteous, my brothers!” could be heard by La Jolla Chicken as he finished his set in the 1951 Long Board surfing competition off the sands of Manhattan Beach, California. “Did you feel that curl? Totally Tubular” he continued, “Cowabunga”. But where did the term cowabunga come from? Now you know. Some give credit for […]
Chainsaw Chicken Area
No, it’s not an autonomous zone like CHAZ or George Floyd Square. It’s a popularized expression of a community awareness. Groups who mutually gather with a common joy of a single thought or concept. But they don’t block others from entering or exposing those less aware to the idea. All skin colors, ethnicity, races, creeds, […]
Our Glorious Leader
Excitement is at a fevered pitch around the ‘Holy Communal Center’ as the 50 chosen wives ready themselves for the largest marriage ever seen in the mountains of Nevada at the ‘Church of the Anointed Chicken’ . Each of these brides have had private interviews with Our Glorious Leader in the past weeks. They have […]