The White House is remarkably silent after the announcement of VP Harris’ New Messaging approach. With her ever increasing number of staffers jumping ship, there was a concern about the VP’s messaging. Realizing this, the VP seized on the suggestion made of the Greg Gutfeld Show, stated by regular Tyrus, “that everything she says sounds […]
Mud Hens Catcher
One of the lessor known members of the Mud Hens was their catcher, named Rudy ‘Bath House’ Chicken. Rudy was a very friendly guy to the team. Always the funny guy in the locker room, especially in the showers. He was known to frequent bath houses in each city the team traveled to. That’s how […]
New Dis-Info Czar
New Dis-Info Czar, O’Brien Chicken, was appointed as the replacement for the misaligned predecessor whose tenure ended faster than CNN-plus. Yes, with the embarrassment of a cancelled Broadway show, Dis-Info Czar appointee Nina Jankowicz resigned her position stating the “disinformation ruined her position as disinformation czar”. Suddenly, DHS was at a loss as what to […]
New Adult Party Place
A new adult party place was launched outside of the regional headquarters of Tyson Chicken in Springdale, Arkansas. While admittedly these establishments are clearly not for everyone, the popularity of adult party businesses have been increasing throughout the country. In this photo, taken by a local newspaper reporter. He was also attending the launch. He […]
Not me…really!
The internet has been all a buzz about Joe Biden getting pooped on by a bird when he spoke in Iowa. You probably saw it on the news. When that happened, people all over started suggesting it was me, Chainsaw. That I was the one in the rafters. It was not me…really! Clearly that’s not […]
Chainsaw Gets 33rd Degree
In a surprise ceremony at Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd, Chainsaw was so astonished to learn that he had been awarded the honors of a 33rd Degree Freemason of the Scottish Rite. With that, comes membership in the Illuminati as well as New World Order using Build Back Better. Who would have known that the lunch […]
Financial Yacht Party
My Uncle, Hunter Chicken, was commissioned to bring his 75 meter yacht to the coastal area of Delaware for those ‘hanger-ons’ and “unofficial” foreign government representatives of the current administration to party with the son of the ‘big guy’. There the twins from Ukraine, Mushi and Pushi. There’s Shemi from Uzbekistan and there’s Miss Columbia’s […]
Bringing Back Walt
In a somewhat predictable move today, the largest minority share holders of Disney stock (DIS) have hired Dr. DeBakie Chicken to manage a controversial move. What move? It seems that this minority block has persuaded a Disney employee to remove the frozen head of Walt Disney from the cryogenic vault below Disneyland where the founders […]
The last known Yhicken
The last known Yhicken Indian, ‘Fri’ was also claimed to be the last “wild” Native American Poultry. A survivor of the 1976 Three Processors Massacre. He was found alone near the processing plant in White Water, Arkansas in 1981. He was on the verge of death. In August of that year, Fri was placed under […]
Time-Travel Success
Rosco Chicken turned to his younger cousin Waldo Chickadee in order to synchronize the simultaneous launch of their science project. When both operators pushed their buttons, a flash of color filled the air. They later called this “The Pepto Bismol Blast” with it’s bright pink blast of energy. Waldo and Rosco had made this discovery […]
“Looking at Uranus” Closes
“Looking at Uranus”, is a Broadway play based on the life of Astronomer William ‘Eggs’ Herschel, who discovered the planet Uranus in 1781. There was much anticipation for the opening of this period piece musical. In the light of the success of ‘Hamilton’, it seemed justified. While the major players were generally unknown, Chainsaw Chicken […]
Russian TV Interrupted
Some of you may have seen the short video of a television station employee stepping out behind the Russian TV announcer to tell watchers that they need to know the truth about the war with Ukraine. It made the news everywhere. Those 20 seconds startled the world. But if you had let the program continue, […]
NEW: Barn Yard Flakes
From Compost Cereals, the makers of ‘Colon Blow’, now brings you a new breakfast treat called ‘Barn Yard Flakes’. Yes… You too can get that daily need of dried residue from our corporate facilities. Scrape up a heaping bowl of new ‘Barn Yard Flakes’ breakfast cereal, sit back and work your way threw all the […]
Secret Decoder Ring
Ever notice how confusing and disconnected some political people can be in their speeches and press conferences? I tried and tried to really understand their statements. I would take the key sentence and diagram it on a white board so I could get the full meaning of what was being expressed. But alas, I just […]
Nun for me!
Henrietta Pluck was always the kind of girl that seemed to be a trouble magnet. In middle school she was involved in a money scandal when she ran the student store and was accused of skimming alittle something off everything she sold. Suddenly, a 5 cent pencil was a quarter. College rule notebook paper doubled […]
Poultry Pugilist
Here’s a piece of sports trivia that most do not know. A Poultry Pugilist. Between the years of 1909 to 1913, Henry ‘Bantam’ Roosterio was the champion of Bare Knuckle Fighting. His record was 178 wins and one loss. Most of these fights were held in abandoned warehouses, open parking lots and in some barn […]
Skippy & Scooter Luge
Little did we know that after recently celebrating the blessed wedding of Scooter and Skippy, we would get a glimpse of their honeymoon. It seems that the two have slipped under the radar and were actually members of the U.S. Olympic team that headed for the Genocide Olympic Games from Beijing. Their event is the […]
I am a Triplet
I am a Triplet. I know. We all look identical because we are. You can really tell we’re brothers. That’s me on the left. That’s Ichabod is on the right. He’s a life coach. Aloysius is in the center. He’s the local MMA featherweight Champion. I like to think that I’m the ladies man but […]
Romper Room Romance
I always thought Miss Nancy never ‘smacked wise’ to my Romper Room Romance. I was a crafty devil with little Sara Leghorn. She was my very first, real life girlfriend. Our days on Romper Room went by with just a wiz of time. She sit there all pretty and calm. I would keep turning my […]
Genocide Games Zamboni
Have you been watching the Genocide Olympic Games from Beijing? Have you noticed how smooth and flawless the ice is? After all those skaters from hockey or ice dancing cutting grooves it can be pretty tricky for the competitors. They don’t show it much on the coverage but you should know that it’s Chainsaw Chicken […]