You might not know that the movie ‘Harold and Maude” (1971) was a smoldering classic in the eyes of Paramount. So much so that they made what was later to be the first ‘prequel’ before it was considered an option to leverage movies with measured popularity but steaming potential. Now if you know anything about […]
Chainsaw for Cal Gov
This week Chainsaw Chicken announced that he was officially throwing his hat into the ring as a replacement for soon to be recalled California Governor Gavin Newsom. “Tick Tock”is all Chainsaw would say at his presser. When the reporter from CNN challenged Chainsaw’s credentials making him worthy of running the 3rd largest economy in the […]
Help Wanted
Help Wanted: We are growing into a woke company and we are now accepting applications for the position of Regional Organic Media Agitator. Applicants for this entry-level position need to possess the following skills and requirements; Successfully completed bachelor-level accreditation in social awareness Have social media account that we can inspect and quantify the amount […]
Doin’ his bit…
After all the hoopla about shutting down oil and gas production within the USA, Chainsaw decided he would take steps to ‘do his bit’ about energy. He converted his bicycle with a generator integrated into a rear-wheel stand that connects to a battery storage device. “I can peddle for about 6 hours a day and […]
Moose? Why not Mine?
I’m sure you’ve heard about items made from Moose excrement, as well as quail and other critters where they fashion their droppings into other cute or decorative things. I had to ask myself, “Why not do the same?” Now I would like to offer some items made from my poop. Remember, even though a big […]
Gunga Galunga
Who can forget Carl’s story-telling about the time he was a looper for the Dali Lama… “So, I’m on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one – big hitter, the Lama – long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do […]
Another ‘Joe Blob’
Well, Joe has hit again! He’s shutting down more energy creators and with that, more jobs gone. This is beginning to happen more and more. So much that a new uncomplimentary term as become attached. Many now say that “Joe has given me a Joe Blob”, an apparent reference to the 1958 movie “The Blob” […]
Death Grip Test
“We need something new and different” shouted D.C. Fontana the writer of this episode. She was speaking to Leonard and Bill as they did their walk-thru for blocking, preparing for that days shooting of “The Enterprise Incident” (Season 3, Episode 2) airing in September of 1968. Leonard suggested, “How about I give Bill a hard […]
Last State Filed
Filing his ballot measure in the last state of a Nation wide tour, Chainsaw paid the $15 bucks to the filing clerk in an attempt to have year round Turkey hunting season in all states. That’s right. No safe refuge for those pesky turkeys. “The only safe place for turkey’s is their adopted home site, […]
Biden Inaugural Dinner
As the USA and much of the free world celebrates the inauguration of President Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. and Vice-President Kamala Devi Harris (she even wore a dress), Chainsaw Chicken has commissioned a traditional celebration dinner. Invited are the new President and Vice-President, the First Lady Dr. Jill ‘Kildare‘ Tracy Biden (née Jacobs, formerly Stevenson) […]
Unwanted Attention
With the rapid and overwhelming popularity of Chainsaw Chicken emerging throughout the Western World, there are bound to be imposters, fakes, impersonators, body doubles, doppelgangers, clones and mimics. Here is an example that simply numbs the mind. Chainsaw stated, when viewing this photo, “OMG! I’d never wear a partial grass skirt while doing this. How […]
Reeducation Camps Begin
“I really feel that turkey’s are so inferior as I have stated many times in my editorials. All educated chickens should agree. We need to do something about this. Some kind of sanitizing process. It has finally been materialized. After years of our persuasion and protests, arguments, complaints and demands”, Chainsaw stated in his interview […]
Dad’s Aunt’s
I tell ya, I was really confused growing up because of dad’s family. With all his family members running in and out of the house, but not all the time. I remember one time mom flew home to see grandma Bubbles (on a plane…stupid!) Any way, the whole time she was away and I mean […]
Captain’s Dark Mess
Remember when you sat in front of the TV each day, a fudgesicle in one hand and a glass of ‘Rootin’ Tootin’ Raspberry’ Funny Face drink-mix in the other when Captain Kangaroo would come on. Those were the days… But did you know the dark secret of Mr. Green jeans, the Captain’s friend and associate […]
Sea Hunt is back!
That right! The spine tingling underwater drama of Mike Nelson taking on the world’s problems from a child loosing his bike in a drainage ditch to a B-1b bomber accidentally dropping it’s load of undetonated hydrogen bombs deep in an adversarial lake area like Russia or Texas. NBC has a habit of taking old and […]
Grüne Polizei
Chainsaw recently imported a genuine Green Police (Grüne Polizei) VW from Germany. As the leaders of the Green Doctrine around the world they have become known for their forward thinking, woke-ness, progressive, yet moderate edict spew onto the populace of the country. And it’s coming with the new controllers in government right here in River […]
The Emu is OUT!
That’s right! The Emu is gone. “We’re tired of chasing that stupid angry bird all over the studio lot” said the production manager of those ongoing Liberty Mutual commercials. “We need something more manageable”. Time for nephew Tab Chicken to step in. Tab is a struggling print model that was told at a young age […]
Steamed Tenders
New Years Resolution in action! Chainsaw and his twin sisters, Lavern and Shirley, have pledged that this year they are going to do what it takes to lose those unwanted extra Covid-19 pounds. Like the commercials say, our work is just too close to the refrigerator, or in our case to close to the grain […]
According to Whoopie
Last week, Chainsaw’s aunt, Ilean (not his Chinese aunt Irean) was in the hot seat as a guest on The View. In a moment of superiority and total authority, Whoopi Goldberg said that Joe Biden should appoint his wife Dr. Jill Biden Surgeon General. Whopie continued. “She’s a hell of a doctor”. “I’m hoping Dr. […]
New Foods to Eat
Oh Yum! Look what’s coming! Seems that since the start of 2019, customers of some supermarket chain called Kaufland have had the choice between garlic and herb flavored mealworms, or buffalo worms with hints of sour cream and onion. Hmmmm… my mouth is watering, from bile. And then there’s foods made from insects, such as […]